Living in Zurich, we meet a lot of expats. They get sent over by their American employers to do a specific job here. They come with varying benefit packages that may, or may not include all of the following; free trips home once a year to the States, paid tuition for their children in a private English speaking school, subsidized housing (meaning the company pays part of their rent, allowing them to get bigger, nicer apartments than usual), and a huge container to transport all of their worldly goods back and forth across the Atlantic. However, what they all have in common is that, eventually, they have to go home.
Friday, March 12, it was time for Jenna and her family to go home. Being the friend with the largest car meant that I got the dubious honor of driving them to the airport. Jenna had made no secret of the fact that she was not good with goodbyes, and had very consciously told everyone "See you later!" instead of "Goodbye!". Yes, there were a few tears, but she tried to keep it light, and out of respect for her wishes, so did we. Even at her goodbye party with all the Zurich Ladies, there were hardly any tears, at least that I saw. We all just joked and laughed and had fun.
In the morning as I was getting ready to go pick them up from their hotel, Chris started to say, "Remember before Jenna came, and you were all sad because you didn't have any close friends here…" And I had to put up my hand and tell him "Stop! Just stop! Don't get me going! I have to stay happy!" But of course, a few tears had already welled up in my eyes. I was determined to not cry, so that I wouldn't set Jenna off, and ruin her flight home. Keeping The Big Ugly Cry at bay was of tantamount importance. 🙂
I drove up to the hotel, and honestly was happy to see them all standing out there, surrounded by luggage, big grins on their faces. Thanks to my car's generous proportions and Jarrod's excellent packing skills, we managed to fit all 6 people, 8 pieces of luggage and 2 miscellaneous bags of random (truly random) stuff from their apartment. The whole way to the airport, we were laughing and joking, or just talking calmly about whatever.
Pulled up to the curbside drop off, and I seriously thought it was a miracle, how well we were all doing. I didn't even have a lump in my throat or anything! This was going to be a piece of cake. Got the car all unloaded, shut the doors, said goodbye to the girls and Jarrod, and then Jenna hugged me. And I totally.lost.it. All that pent up sadness of losing one of my best friends hit me like a brick to the gut. I couldn't even speak, I was sobbing so hard. I just stood there, hugging her, while she was saying goodbye, nodding my head like a crazy person.
I finally managed to squeak out a goodbye, and let her go. I waved until they had entered the terminal, and then I climbed back into my car. I had to sit there and cry for a few more minutes, until I thought I was calmed down enough to drive. Seriously, driving while sobbing is more dangerous than driving while drunk, I think. I could hardly see the road, had no real sense of where I was in relation to the other cars, it was scary stuff. I took a couple huge, deep breaths and pulled myself together so I could drive home in relative safety. I did bust out with a couple more sobs here and there, but overall I did great, considering.
The rest of the day, I would randomly break out in tears, but the kids knew what had happened and were very understanding. Chris called from work after I got home, to see how it went, and let me just cry on the phone to him. Poor guy! Every man's worst nightmare; a sobbing, incoherent female! 🙂
That night I made a firm vow to work harder at the friendships I have with the people who live here. I need to do more to nurture them, to invest time and effort in them. Being that sad when someone leaves is a good thing. It shows how much you learned from them, and how much richer your life was having had them in it.